understanding cost

[Written December 6, 2017]

House visits

This morning while I was meditating I felt the Holy Spirit tell me to read Mark 14. I didn’t remember what Mark 14 entailed or if I had even heard Him clearly, but I flipped to this passage in my bible and skimmed through some scriptures before realizing what He had set a part for me to read this morning: Mark 14:3-9 “Jesus Anointed at Bethany.”

Okay Jesus. I get it. Let’s read on…

To give some context, I spent the majority of 2017 out of Canada. In early January, I moved to the UK to study History abroad for a semester. I was back home for two weeks in June to visit friends and family and attend my brother’s graduation before flying back to Europe for another four months with YWAM (Youth With A Mission).

I was gone for almost 10 months this year and met forever friends from all over the world. My season abroad was indescribably brilliant and unbelievably challenging. A reoccurring theme that the Lord placed in my path was “cost.” I was asked by the Holy Spirit many, many times this year what the cost is to me of being a disciple of Jesus (disciple simply means follower) (Luke 14:33).

In Luke 14:24-34, Jesus talks about the “Cost of Being a Disciple” to the crowds and His own disciples. Jesus explains that true discipleship lies in surrendering every other way in one’s life to God. In John 14:5-6, Jesus explains to Thomas (a disciple) that He is the Way and the Truth and the Life and no one can come to Father God except through Him. Jesus is the only WAY.

When we give life and allowance to other ways in our life that we worship, idolize and grapple hold of instead of surrendering to Jesus as our only WAY, we are permitting double-mindedness, control, fear and doubt to invade our faith in King Jesus.

Rhino Refugee Camp, Arua, Uganda

Jesus warns us of this in Luke 14. We cannot follow Jesus as well as be followers of ourselves. Yes, Christ’s blood has washed us clean. Yes, we are the New Creation when we give our lives to Jesus and are baptized by water and renewed in our mind’s by Holy Spirit. But until Jesus comes back to establish His earthly Kingdom, we’re still human and remain vulnerable to the temptations of our flesh. And the Tempter would do anything to have you, because Satan hates Christ in you.

I have held on to MUCH in my life. Jesus has done immeasurable damage-control in me because of all the different ways I’ve previously allowed in my life. This year Jesus told me that He was doing a new thing in my life, and in order to perceive it, I must lay down my wayward tendencies to allow His Way to begin to take root in my heart. And it was excruciating, but I figured the only thing I had to lose was who I wasn’t created to be anyways.

Every divisive thought. Every double-minded doubt. Every fear. All control. His alter.

Freedom is sweet, my friends. However, that’s not to say I’m not still tempted by the enemy or that I no longer am swayed by my old nature, because I am sometimes. But the victory is final. Jesus won when He was raised to life after He died on the cross for our sins. Because of this, Satan is powerless in his VERY nature. Satan only gains power when we willfully agree with him regarding who he says we are not.

We are sons and daughters in OUR very nature and we were purchased at the highest cost, by Jesus’s blood; the very Son of God Himself.

So, to get back to Mark 14…

I’ve had to lay down many precious and costly people, things, and habits in my life to follow Jesus, the only Way. I recently got hit with a fresh wave of what the cost is of following Jesus. But I rejoice in God! Because the Pioneer and Perfecter of our faith LOVES our hearts and honours our sacrifices deeply. It’s to our JOY to lay down what is precious to us because we are precious to HIM!

Lake Victoria, the source of the Nile River

In Mark 14:3-9, Mary expressed her great love to Jesus by breaking her very costly jar of pure nard to anoint Jesus with precious oil. Although she got criticized for her actions by some of Jesus’ disciples (“There were some who said to themselves indignantly, ‘Why was the ointment wasted like that? For this ointment could have been sold for more than a year’s wages and given to the poor. And they scolded her’” (14:4-5), Jesus loved the posture of her heart for Him. Mary was treating Jesus as the finest earthly King by anointing Him with the finest perfume. She knew who Jesus was and willfully gave to Him what was of great worth to her. And He loved her because Mary truly understood COST, even more than Jesus’ disciples.

“But Jesus said, ‘Leave her alone. Why do you trouble her? She has done a beautiful thing to me” (14:6).

“She has done what she could, she has anointed my body beforehand for burial. And truly, I say to you, wherever the gospel is proclaimed in the whole world, what she has done will be told in memory of her” (14:8-9).

Lillian, my friend and translator

Jesus loves me. He is honoured when I willfully give Him what is of great cost to me because He paid the highest cost on the cross for me. My precious surrender to His Kingship is a beautiful aromatic perfume to Him; a perfume He deeply values and rewards with a Kingly blessing. For very precious reasons I do not yet know, surrendering to Jesus what I value highly will only BLESS Christ IN me, the HOPE of glory (Colossians 1:27)! Holy Spirit promises that hope will not disappoint me (Romans 5:5), so I will freely hope in what Jesus has ordained for me.

There is no downside in surrender, friends, there are only promises that have always been set a part for you and eagerly await you.

That is the cost of being a disciple: it’s not what we choose to hold onto and define as valuable, but rather it’s what we can willfully choose to lay down to anoint our Finest King. That, in itself, is the very expression of truly understanding cost.

A few of our partners and friends in ministry

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